Almost Too Late
by celticsketches
Summary: No one noticed anything was wrong until it was almost too late. The subtle changes that happened over the past few months went unnoticed by almost everyone. It was until she was almost dead that they realized how serious things had become.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or anything associated with it._

This is my first fanfiction. Hopefully it is ok and people will like it. Please leave me comments and reviews so I can improve. However, if you are going to say something nasty, I'd rather you not post - I'd prefer constructive criticism instead.

This story takes place somewhere in Season 2 . I will try my best to follow the story as close as possible, but I will probably deviate from it here and there. This story is dealing mostly with Addison and Derek but I will mention the other characters.

In the future this story will deal with abuse (verbal and physical) as well as eating disorders. It won't be too graphic, but it is rated at M to be on the safe side.

*****

Prologue (present day):

No one noticed anything was wrong until it was almost too late. The subtle changes that happened over the past few months went unnoticed by almost everyone. It was until she was almost dead that they realized how serious things had become.

Chapter 1:

Addison thought back to the interaction between herself and Derek earlier that day:

_"You really are Satan, you realize that right? If Satan were to take physical form he'd be you, everywhere. All the time."_

_"I am not Satan."_

_"How come you haven't gotten on your broomstick and gone back to New York where you belong?"_

_"Stop being petty."_

_"Stop being an adulterous bitch."_

_"You know there was a time when you thought of me as your best friend."_

_"There was a time that I thought you were the love of my life. Things change."_

It hurt her that he called her Satan. True, she messed up big time, but that didn't mean it still didn't hurt to hear it. Sleeping with Mark had been a mistake. It had been a drunken mistake that she wished she could take back. She was not in love with Mark. The sex had been completely meaningless for her. Derek was absent and she was lonely. She had had one too many drinks and ended up sleeping with Mark.

Derek left her the next day and she was crushed. Addison really wanted to make it work again with Derek. He was the love of her life and sleeping with Mark had not changed that feeling. Unfortunately, after reflecting on their earlier conversation, it appeared that she was no longer the love of Derek's life.

Addison gave Derek the divorce papers later that day. She figured that if he was going to call her Satan, he did not want to try and work on their relationship. Even though it killed her to think of getting a divorce, she knew she had too if Derek was not willing to give the relationship another try.

It had surprised her to no end then, that Derek had not signed the papers. Apparently, after thinking it over, he decided he could not just give up on eleven years of marriage. Although she tried not to show too much excitement when Derek told her he was willing to give their marriage a shot, inside she was bursting with joy. Sadly, it was this joy that almost ended her life.


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or anything associated with it._

This is my first fanfiction. Hopefully it is ok and people will like it. Please leave me comments and reviews so I can improve. However, if you are going to say something nasty, I'd rather you not post - I'd prefer constructive criticism instead.

This story takes place somewhere in Season 2 . I will try my best to follow the story as close as possible, but I will probably deviate from it here and there. Enjoy!

Sorry this chapter is so short!

*****

Chapter 2:

That first night with Derek in the trailer was awkward. Addison wasn't sure how intimate she should be with Derek. She knew he hadn't totally forgiven her yet and she didn't want to go overboard. As they both climbed awkwardly into bed, Addison snuggled in close to Derek.

When Derek felt Addison snuggle against him, he stiffened and said into the quietness of the night, "Just because I decided to give this marriage another shot doesn't mean I'm ready to snuggle with an adulterous bitch like you."

Derek's words were like a slap in the face. She instantly recoiled from Derek and rolled over to the edge of the bed. She knew this was going to be hard, but she didn't expect Derek to be so nasty. She gripped her pillow as tears rolled silently down her face. She would not break down and cry. She would not let Derek see that he hurt her.

On the other side of the bed, Derek rolled over onto his side. He wished he was sharing his bed with Meredith. He wondered why on earth he decided to give his marriage another try. He was happy with Meredith. Sure things could be rocky between them, but he had fallen for her. And then his wife suddenly appeared and he had to play the good guy. He had to try to make it work for at least a little bit. Derek couldn't look like the bad guy. He would give an outward appearance of attempting to make things work. But in the privacy of the trailer, he decided he would do his best to push her away. If she left on her own, then he was free to go back to Meredith and not be the guy that abandoned his wife. With those thoughts, Derek drifted off to sleep.

Sleep did not come so easily for Addison. She lay awake replaying words over and over again in her head, "Bitch. Adulterous whore. Adulterous bitch. Satan. Whore. Bitch. Bitch. Whore."

What had she gotten herself into?


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or anything associated with it._

This is my first fanfiction. Hopefully it is ok and people will like it. Please leave me comments and reviews so I can improve. However, if you are going to say something nasty, I'd rather you not post - I'd prefer constructive criticism instead.

This story takes place somewhere in Season 2 . I will try my best to follow the story as close as possible, but I will probably deviate from it here and there. Enjoy!

*****

**Chapter 3:**

The next week passed by in a blur for Addison. She was busy with cases and working long hours at the hospital. She hardly saw Derek at all that week. Both were kept busy with work. But that was ok with Addison. To everyone at the hospital, it appeared that the Shepherds were trying their best to make things work. On the morning where Derek and Addison came in to the hospital together, they would be holding hands or Derek would have his arm around Addison's waist.

During these moments, Addison was confused. At home, Derek wanted nothing to do with her. But suddenly, when they were around other people, he acted like her husband. Addison hated how he treated her at home. At night, they might as well have been sleeping in different beds. Ever since the first night when Addison tried to snuggle into Derek and was rejected, she kept to her side of the bed.

One night after they both climbed into the bed, Addison spoke into the darkness, "Derek, why are you so cold to me at home?"

Derek replied, "Because I'm in love with Meredith- not you."

Addison gulped and said softly, "If you love her, then why don't we just get a divorce? I gave you the papers once already. If you sign then you can be with Meredith."

"I will not be the bad person in this marriage. You cheated on me and I took you back. I'm the forgiving husband and you are the adulterous whore. You are dead to me," replied Derek in a cold and even tone.

Addison replied shakily, "I'm sorry Derek. You have no idea how sorry I am. I love you and I want this to work. Please try to forgive me. I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. I won't let you go. If you want to be with Meredith, you will have to be the one to end this. I think it can work if you agree to try..."

Derek sighed and said, "Fine. We will try to work on it and I will try to be nicer to you."

"Thank you Derek," said Addison. "This really means a lot to me. I love you and will never hurt you again."

With those last words she carefully reached over and grabbed Derek's hand. She expected him to pull away, but he didn't. Instead he gave her hand a gentle squeeze. They lay side by side holding hands until both of them fell asleep.

In the morning, Addison woke to find herself snuggled into Derek's sleeping form. She sighed contentedly and drifted back off to sleep.

Derek lay there feigning sleep. He heard Addison sigh and then drift back off to sleep. As he lay there, he pretended that the women in his arms was Meredith.

He decided to slightly re-think his plan. It was obvious that Addison was sorry. Maybe he should attempt to make the relationship work. After all, she was his wife. She was his wife that he hated at this moment, but she was his wife. Meredith had been avoiding him at work anyway. Obviously she was hurt that he didn't tell her he was married. He thought as long as Meredith was mad at him, he might as well try to make things work. At least he would probably still get some sex out of it, he thought. Surely once he tries to be nicer to Addison, she will want to sleep with him. Derek knew he was good in bed and that he could make Addison melt and do anything he wanted her to...


	4. Chapter 4

_Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or anything associated with it._

Umm... I make not claim to any medical accuracy. What little knowledge I have comes from watching Grey's and House so there will probably be errors so I didn't go into too much detail.

I don't know what I was saying earlier. There will **definately** be plot changes. Duh. But I might mention things that happen in the tv show or use quotes from it.

Also, thanks so much to those who gave me reviews and put my story on alert. I really appreciate it and it makes me very happy! I've taken your advice and tried to write a longer chapter. Hopefully this one is better. Please, let me know if you think this chapter is still too short. Thanks!

*****

**Chapter 4:**

Later that day, Addison sat alone at a lunch table. She'd only been at work for 4 hours, but she was exhausted . She rubbed her temples and wondered how she would make it through the next 32 hours of her shift.

Already, she'd had to perform an emergency c-section and had almost lost the baby. The baby had been premature and in distress. She tried everything should could to stop the labor, but she'd had no such luck. The baby was small and its lungs were not fully functioning on its own yet. She knew that she would have to be carefully monitor the baby all day to make sure it would be ok. She sighed in frustration. The day was not shaping up to very good.

On top of the sick baby, the interns were giving her hell. No one wanted to work with her. They had all formed this little pack and she was shunned by all of them. All of them seemed to be on Meredith's side. They went out of their way to be cold and disrespectful to her without crossing the line.

Alex Karev was one of the worst. He was making it absolutely certain that everyone knew he wanted nothing to do with the "gynie squad." Of course she couldn't let an intern back talk to her so as punishment, she put Karev on her service. Unfortunately this now meant that he was there all the time with his bad attitude.

The beeping of her pager snapped her out of her reverie. She checked her pager and read 911. This could only mean that her preemie case was taking a turn for the worse. She jumped to her feet and rushed to the NICU. Karev was there was there performing CPR and pushing epi. As she rushed to the baby, its erradic heart rate suddenly flat lined. A nurse was there with a crash cart and as Addison charged the paddles, she yelled "Clear!" The heart rate continued to flat line and she shocked the tiny heart once more, and then again. No response. She stood there with the paddles in her hands and stared at the tiny baby. "Time of death 12:43 pm," she whispered. No matter how many times she lost a baby, it never got any easier. She walked slowly off to tell the parents. She couldn't stand to see their expressions when she told them the news.

As Addison left the parents room, tears started to trickle slowly down her face. She made her way into an on-call room and crashed. She lay in the bed and sobbed for the lost baby. She sobbed for the parents whose joy was ended in an instant. She sobbed for her failing marriage. She sobbed for the fact that she was utterly alone.

Things were better with Derek but the stress of trying to make their marriage work was taking a toll on her. At least Derek was sort of talking to her and they had cuddled last night. She lay there a little while more before she went and washed her face. She fixed her hair and re-applied her streaked make-up. As she strode down the hallway of the hospital, no one would have ever guessed that she had lay sobbing in an on-call room.

Addison made it through her shift and arrived exhausted to the trailer. She wanted to nothing more than take a shower and crawl into bed. Upon entering the trailer, she discovered Derek wasn't home yet. She stripped off her clothes and hopped in to shower. Soon, the hot water pounding on her back was lulling her to sleep. She turned the water off and got out of the shower. She toweled off and put on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. She towel dried her hair and twisted it up into a messy bun.

Just as she was laying down, Derek arrived back at the trailer.

"Hey sweetie, how was your day?"

"It was terrible. I had a patient die and I'm just exhausted. All I want it to just go to sleep" said Addison sleepily.

"Well thats going to have to wait. I have other plans," said Derek roughly. As he spoke these words he crossed over to the bed and lay down next to Addison. He started kissing her neck and ear.

"Stop Derek. Please. I'm not in the mood," said Addison.

Derek replied forcefully, "I don't care. I'm in the mood for sex and I want it now." As Derek said this, he started trying to remove Addison's shirt. Addison tried to push him off of her but Derek grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head. She struggled against him but he was too strong for her in her exhausted state.

"Please Derek, don't do this," whispered Addison.

Derek didn't appear to hear her. Using one hand to pin her arms above her head, he used his other hand to pull her pants off. He then proceeded to pull down his pants. He started kissing and biting her neck. She tried to fight him off, but he was just too strong.

In a sudden motion that took her breath away, he thrust himself inside her. He was so forcefully that pain ripped through her. She whimpered in pain and whispered, "Please Derek... stop..."

Derek was past listening. He held her down and thrust forcefully into her over and over again. Addison could feel no pleasure with the actions taking place. She closed her eyes tight and tried not to think about what was happening to her. She was being raped by her own husband.

When Derek finished, he collapsed on top of her and breathed into her ear, "Thanks Addie. I really needed that." With that last statement, he rolled over and fell asleep.

Sleep did not come for Addison that night. She was humiliated and hurt. Silent tears poured down her face. She finally fell into a restless sleep. When she awoke, Derek was gone.


	5. Chapter 5

_Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or anything associated with it._

This is my first fanfiction. Hopefully it is ok and people will like it. Please leave me comments and reviews so I can improve. However, if you are going to say something nasty, I'd rather you not post - I'd prefer constructive criticism instead.

This story takes place somewhere in Season 2 .

Thank you for all your wonderful comments! Please, continue reviewing and giving me comments on how I can improve. I tried to make this chapter longer than the last one. I think I am getting better at writing a little bit longer.

I'm trying to update as often as I can. I can only write when my roommate isn't here (which is not that often) because she would really not understand about me reading/writing fanfictions. I'm pretty sure she would think I am insane. So, I only get to work on it 45 minutes or so every couple days.

*****

**Chapter 5**

Addison awoke to find Derek's side of the bed empty. He must have gotten a call from the hospital for an emergency surgery since he wasn't supposed to be on call today. She lay there in the quiet of the trailer and tried not to think about the events that had transpired last night. As she stumbled out of bed, she was overwhelmed with the urge to take a shower. She stripped off her clothes and turned the water on until it was as hot as she could stand it. She stood under the hot water and let it massage her back. Standing in the comfort of the shower, the memories from the previous night flooded into her mind.

"_Derek STOP!" she cried out. He was hurting her. This wasn't her Derek. Her Derek loved her and would never do something like this. It was as if a monster had taken his place. _

"_God, Addie, I love you." he panted out between thrusts. Derek knew he was hurting her. He also knew that he was scaring her. In the moments leading up to his climax, he had never before felt so powerful. He was in complete control of this beautiful creature laying under him. She was offering up no resistance to his powerful thrusts. She simply lay there with her eyes shut and took whatever he had to offer. This new feeling of power led Derek to an all time high. Never before had he been so hurtful. He like it. He enjoyed seeing Addison's eyes scrunched shut in pain. He enjoyed hearing the little gasps she made every once in a while. In short, Derek loved the power and control he had over her._

_Derek kissed and bit at Addison's neck. Her skin crawled to feel his lips upon it. He was biting her and she knew it would leave marks. She just hoped they would go away before she had to work again. She lay there taking his abuse because she new it was useless to offer up any resistance. _

_And when he had finished, the only other thing he had said to her that night was "Thanks Addie. I really needed that."_

_After he rolled over and fell asleep, Addison went to the bathroom and cleaned herself up. She pulled her pants back on and slid back into bed. She lay there staring at the ceiling for what seemed like hours before sleep finally took her... _

Addison started sobbing as she stood in the shower. She finally allowed herself to feel the trauma of the night before. She sank to the floor of the shower. She sobbed as she held her knees and rocked herself. When she finally ran out of tears, Addison sat under the water in a kind of daze. The water poured down around her as she rocked herself. She buried her head in her arms and sat there until the water ran cold. Finally, after sitting in the shower for over an hour, she finally got up. She turned off the now freezing water and stepped out of the shower. She dried her shivering body off and put her sweatpants and t-shirt back on. She slid her frozen body back into bed and tried to sleep.

Derek's day was going wonderfully. He was still feeling the high from his experiences last night. Derek had been roused from his slumber at around 7:30am by a 911 page. A man had been in a car crash and flown through the window of his car. He needed emergency brain surgery. Derek rushed to the hospital and scrubbed in. He stood over the body and proclaimed, "All right everybody. It's a beautiful morning to save lives."

It was a beautiful morning indeed. Derek was able to reduce the swelling in the patient's brain, and, miraculously, the patient was going to be just fine. After scrubbing out, Derek walked jauntily to the cafeteria. He hadn't had time to eat any breakfast in his rush to the hospital. He was starving after the workout he had last night. He felt himself get excited every time he thought about it. The sex had been amazing. At least, it had been amazing for him. He was pretty sure that Addison had been unable to orgasm. In fact, he was pretty sure it was the worst sex Addison had ever had. That was just fine with Derek though. After all, she was an adulterous bitch. Really, she deserved it. She didn't deserve to have satisfying sex with her husband after what she had done.

As he ate his breakfast, he caught Meredith's eye while she sat with the other interns. He flashed his patented "McDreamy" smile at her. She gave him a small smile in return. Derek knew that Meredith couldn't resist him. She still loved him, he was sure of it. After he finished eating, Derek got up and walked over to the intern's table. "Dr. Grey, would you like to assist me in surgery this afternoon?" asked Derek, flashing another smile.

"Sure," replied Meredith. She was a little unsure about working with Derek again, but she couldn't pass up brain surgery. Things were still a little awkward between them.

Together, they walked to the elevator. When they stepped in, they were all alone. This was the first time they had been alone since Addison had showed up. Derek stood right behind Meredith. As he stood there, he breathed in her scent. He wanted desperately to kiss her. Before he could make a move, the elevator dinged and the doors opened.

As they went to check on the patient, Meredith had to constantly remind herself that Derek was married. She had felt the tension between them in the elevator. She knew Derek had wanted to kiss her. Thank goodness the elevator had opened when it did. She didn't think she would have been able to control herself if Derek had kissed her. She wanted to kiss him, but at the same time, she didn't want to kiss him. He had hurt her. He lied to her. She was humiliated when Addison had showed up. She was still very much in love with Derek, but she knew she couldn't do anything with him. _He has a wife, he has a wife, he has a wife_, she kept reminding herself.

Upon arriving at the patients room, Meredith began prepping the patient for surgery. She loved brain surgery. She hoped it would go well today. Derek seemed to be in such a good mood that she didn't want it to be spoiled by a patient dying. Luckily, Meredith didn't have to worry. Derek performed his second flawless surgery of the day. The rest of Derek's day at the hospital flew by. He only had to check on his two post-op patients and monitor their recovery from their surgeries. At the end of the day, Derek was ready to return home to his wife. He hadn't seen her at the hospital that day, so he assumed she wasn't paged or on call. Derek wasn't in the mood for sex that night. He thought he'd wait another day or two before he approached Addison again. He just wanted to hold her in his arms and be in charge.

Addison remained in bed all day. Luckily, she didn't have to work nor was she paged. She slept off and on the entire day, watched tv, and read. She worried about what was going to happen when Derek got home. She hoped he wouldn't try the same thing again. She was laying in bed reading Vogue when Derek came home.

Derek walked into the trailer to see Addison curled up in bed reading a magazine. It was obvious that she had hardly left the bed the entire day. She was in her sweats, her hair wasn't done, and she didn't have any make-up on. As he walked in the trailer, she looked up from her magazine. He thought he saw a flicker of fear in her eyes when she met his gaze.

Derek was proud of himself. He alone had done this to her. She was his and only his. He pulled off his pants and shirt and climbed into bed next to her. As he lay down, she flinched away from him. When he looked at her face, he saw expressions of fear and uncertainty cross her features. Then, he saw a single, solitary tear roll down her cheek. His heart swelled with love for her. She was perfect and she was his. He pulled her into his arms as she started crying.

"Shhh... Addie.... shhh... its ok," he whispered into her ear. He tenderly wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back. "Its ok, Addie...shhh... stop crying."

Addison melted into his arms... he loved her, she could feel it. Her sobs lessened as Derek started to rock her in his arms.

"I love you Addie," he murmured into her ear. "Whatever happened last night was only because I love you so much."

Addison finally succumbed to a peaceful sleep, safely wrapped in Derek's loving arms. Derek held his sleeping angel tenderly and thought _she is mine_.


End file.
